Sarahn Says – Another way to fall in love with yourself is to be unconditionally kind to everyone around you. You ever notice that after saying something hurtful, getting revenge, or putting someone in their place, you don’t feel better afterwards? You actually feel worse. That’s because it doesn’t feel good to be cruel, angry or mean. It goes against our nature and often throws us off balance. You might walk away from a situation thinking about how the other person feels, but you’re more likely to be thinking about how the situation made you feel…inconsiderate, at fault, and maybe even regretful. On the other hand, it feels so amazing to be kind. Not only do we feel so much better about everything around us, but we feel better about ourselves. We like what we see when we look in the mirror and we know others like what they see as well. The best part about it is that we inspire those around us to be kind. It can be hard to be unconditionally kind to everyone, especially when we’re bogged down by our own problems. It’s even harder when there is negative energy coming from people around us. But you can’t let people get in the way of you loving yourself. That’s just as ridiculous and their negativity! Put a little extra effort in to being kind, even in the face of cruelty. Your ego might take some hits at first, but in the long run you’ll feel amazing. Start today and slowly make it a part of your lifestyle. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – You know what you want to hear, so don’t wait around for anyone to deliver that message. Tell yourself! We often feel confused, doubtful and worrisome about the things that are happening in our lives, who we are, who we want to be, and all the things in between. However, we can’t run from our problems and we have to take it all day-by-day, and sometimes we just want someone to tell us that everything is going to be okay. But it’s important that we hear it in the way that most resonates with us individually. Some people need that tough love, “suck it up and figure it out” motivation. Other people respond best to receiving love and encouragement, while others find that changing their perspective or accepting things for what they are works best for them. You know yourself well enough to know what you respond best to. You don’t have to wait for anyone to tell you what you want to hear. The next time you feel inspired, write down a list of short sentences that work best for you in positively reaffirming yourself. Compile the sentences into a flowing paragraph around 100-130 words, and add it as a note on your cell phone. You can include anything in the paragraph about family, sacrifice, patience, favorability, god etc. Whatever works for you. The next time you are feeling crazy and caught up, refer to the paragraph and allow it to be just the thing you need to get through, find your center, and hopefully even inspire you. Make sure that it’s saying exactly what you need it to, and feel free to revise it when you feel like you need it say something else. Don’t refer to it too often or it will begin to lose its value. Instead, go to it when you need it most and notice how it will instantly change your attitude and the way you feel about your ability to conquer the world. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – It’s important to learn when to say “when.” Unfortunately this is a lesson most people learn the hard way. Good judgment is difficult. Some of us learn it well growing up or maybe just understand it naturally. Most of us just learn from experience. There are many different circumstances that this applies to. For some, it’s about choosing to study vs. going to a party. For others it’s about eating fast food or a healthier option. Fighting for a friendship or letting it go, and apologizing for your mistakes when you know you were wrong. For me it was learning when to speak up and when to stay quiet. I really struggled with this and still do. I always felt like it was my responsibility to be the person who should have something to say…NO. The only responsibility we have is to make the decision that is in our best interest without compromising those around us. No one else (shy of your parents) is going to look out for you more than you will. Your friends don’t have a test tomorrow so that’s not the first thing on their mind, and everybody else will stay quiet when you’re talking back. Think about the possible outcomes of your outburst, impulsiveness and/or careless behavior. Don’t let your pride get in the way of making the right decision and don’t let the pressure of people or outside forces be the reason why you’re compromising yourself. It’s usually not worth it. Hardly ever. But sometimes it takes losing a good friend, gaining a few extra pounds and/or a hit to your GPA for you to get the message. That’s ok. Read my entry The Security in Forgiving Yourself. Try thinking more before you act and visualizing yourself doing something before you do it. Good and bad. This will be beneficial for you, mainly because it decreases the amount of mistakes you make and the regret you’ll feel from making them. It’s even better when it’s not about holding back from making a poor decision but instead choosing to make a good one. Slow it down and visualize the consequences and in the process you will learn when to say “when”. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – In the last entry I talked about absorbing the energies of those around you and training your senses to be somewhat desensitized to all the molecules of the universe bouncing off of you. You don’t want to take everything from everybody. Some things we just want to leave where they are! In saying this, there is an important element to energy that you MUST recognize. You must accept that similar energies are attracted to each other. In the same way that we naturally bond with people who have the same temperament as we do, we also absorb energies that our similar to our own energy. If you are receiving positive or negative energy, most likely there is something in you that that energy is attracted to. Those of us who are more sensitive must pay closer attention to this and be more cautious when it comes to absorbing the energies of others. Being sensitive not only means that you are more fragile to the words and actions of others but also to the energies around you. You might find that you’re feeling down because the people around you are feeling the same way, and you might even get angry and hostile if someone in your company is being negative and/or aggressive. You also might assume that people are personally taking shots at you, or that nothing is going in your favor. Go back to my suggestions in Pt. 1 and find out what works for you with regulating your senses. In the meantime, remind yourself that we are all human and must be tolerant of others as we want others to be tolerant of us. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – Have you ever not known why you’re feeling down? You can’t really pinpoint anything that happened in your day or recognize any stressor that would have you feeling this way. You just know that for some reason you feel off balance, a little sad or anxious. Almost as if the energy of the universe is not in your favor…maybe even against you. We live in a world where everyone has an energy. Some are greater than others, but undoubtedly the feelings and energies of those around us seem to have an influence on us. We must train our senses to be in some ways desensitized to the energies of others. Empathy and compassion are some of the God’s greatest gifts, and we must not lose these things during this process. We must remain faithful to the higher being by continuing to spread love and understanding. These things are what make the world go round. However, we must learn to control what we receive from others, and what we allow them to give us. Maintaining control of your personal energy is one of the important keys to happiness. This can be achieved with prayer, talking to people, meditation, exercise, rest…maybe even crying, walking, screaming, writing, eating or engaging in intimacy with a loved one. Whatever works for you. Experiment. You own your time, space and attention and you have control of what you give it to. Take the time to find out what works for you and discover the many ways in which you can receive the positive energies and reject the negative ones. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – One way to fall in love with yourself, is to spend some time alone. Solitude comes easier for some of us then others. Depending on who we are, where we are, and what’s going on in our lives, we can embrace it with open arms or avoid it like the plague. The reality is, at some point you won’t really have a choice. In order to accomplish your goals, both small and large most efficiently, you’ll have to step away from those around you. It’s not anything to feel down about. You don’t even have to brainstorm all the possible things that could be happening in your absence. Enjoy the time you have to yourself. It’s only at this time when you can do all the crazy, whimsical and impulsive things that make you who you are. You can talk to yourself about the things you’re not ready to share with others, reflect on the past more clearly, and find solutions to some problems you’ve been having. You can become in tune with your thoughts and more aware of your actions, both of which are really important in growth. Not only does spending time alone free you from most distractions but it shows you how much physically, mentally, and spiritually you can accomplish on your own. So remind yourself that you are good company, give your quieter thoughts an arena to be louder, and fall in love with yourself in the process. #sarahnsays

Sarahn Says – Settling gets a bad name in love. We’re taught that to settle in a relationship or position means being pre-maturely content or satisfied with someone who is not everything one thinks they want and need. In reality, no matter who you decide to be with, you are settling. No one is going to have everything you want and need. There is always going to be that thought in your head that maybe there is someone else out there that is more compatible with you or that you can find a higher level of happiness with. Perfect relationships don’t exist in the same way perfect people don’t exist. God will never give us everything so that we can appreciate what we do have. Love is a choice. Commitment is a decision. When you make that choice and that decision, you do it because you’ve found contentment in the bond you share with someone. You do it because you’re satisfied with the level of happiness you have with them and you’re not willing to risk losing it for the idea or possibility of someone or something greater. That act in itself is settling. Take time to find the person that inspires you to choose love and understand that the decision to commit is yours alone. Remember to settle not because you think you can’t do better, but instead because you don’t know what better is. Don’t settle for less, settle for more. #sarahnsays